I have a lot of earrings. I’m not really a necklace sort of person, and bracelets annoy me, but earrings – well, that’s something I can get excited about. I don’t have any that are very valuable (no money for that, and besides, I’d be petrified of losing one) but for me, they’re something that can finish off an outfit and make me feel a bit special. Especially if they’re a bit swooshy and dangly, if you see what I mean…
I came across a pair of earrings I haven’t worn in ages the other day. To tell the truth, I haven’t worn earrings in a few years, not since my daughter discovered at about 9 months that pulling them could be quite good fun. She’s now almost three, but her brother would quite like that game too if he had a chance… But I’d forgotten about my habit of taking them off and leaving them places until I was clearing out a particularly dusty and untidy corner and found a small dish with a button, some balled up thread, and a pair of earrings in it. They were a pair of chainmaille drops that I saw on Etsy a few years ago and fell for immediately – the intricate knot, the silver and gold hoops, and the fact that they were hand made (and not terribly expensive!) all combined to make a little ‘me’ present that brightened up a dull day. They went with everything – and then they were forgotten in a corner. Kind of like the life that I led when I wore them.
When I wore earrings, I was a professional person, a teacher who taught teenagers the correct way to construct a sentence, a respected and liked member of staff at a school that had a growing reputation. Then, I had a baby, and that life faded away. Other people’s children were no longer my priority – I had my own to think about. Before my daughter was 6 months old I knew I didn’t want to go back to work, and my husband was kind and wise enough (and appalled at the cost of nursery care) to agree that I could stay home.
My life became being a mum, and a new world of playgroups, baby clinics and endless laundry emerged. The nice clothes worn to school were put in the back of the cupboard or given to charity shops. I started going out of the house without putting on makeup first (!). Access for breastfeeding became the most important factor when buying clothes. Earrings – well, they definitely weren’t necessary, and then became dangerous to wear. And so, they were put away, left in their dusty corners, dropped behind the dresser and forgotten…
But today, I went shopping. I bought a nice bra, one that isn’t for nursing, to wear when Sam isn’t feeding in the day anymore. Next time I might buy a dress, something I haven’t worn in three years because it’s difficult to breastfeed in. And someday soon, I might look through my earrings. Some definitely won’t be me any more, and they will all need a good cleaning, but maybe one pair might be right for a short outing. Maybe with the new mummy bits of me, I’m ready to have a little bit of the old me back too.
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This a response to the lovely Josie’s Writing Workshop at Sleep is for the Weak.
